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K. November 29, 2014 at 4:29 am

There is far too much judgementalism and fear of rejection in the body to allow for this level of transparency. It is also part of the reason there is so little connection within the members. These days you see more and more intermarriage within a church body. Whatever happened to cherishing relationship because of the blood of Christ? I know this lack of connection is a primary reason we elect to stay away. Being in a group where there is so little intent for true fellowship can seem so much lonlier than not being there at all.

Jack Wellman November 29, 2014 at 9:44 am

You will never find a perfect church and if you do, don’t join it…you’ll ruin it! Being disobedient to being part of the church, called the Body of Christ, is serious business. Church attendance is not just a “good suggestion”; it is God’s will for believers. Hebrews 10:25 says we should “not [be] giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Even in the early church, some were falling into the bad habit of not meeting with other believers. The author of Hebrews says that’s not the way to go. We need the encouragement that church attendance affords. And the approach of the end times should prompt us to be even more devoted to going to church. Jesus said the gates of hell will not prevail against the church so He saw the need of the permanence of the church and you don’t need it?

Church is the place where believers can love one another (1 John 4:12), encourage one another (Hebrews 3:13), “spur” one another to love and good works (Hebrews 10:24), serve one another (Galatians 5:13), instruct one another (Romans 15:14), honor one another (Romans 12:10), and be kind and compassionate to one another (Ephesians 4:32).
When a person trusts Jesus Christ for salvation, he or she is made a member of the body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:27). For a church body to function properly, all of its “body parts” need to be present and working (1 Corinthians 12:14–20). It’s not enough to just attend a church; we should be involved in some type of ministry to others, using the spiritual gifts God has given us (Ephesians 4:11–13). A believer will never reach full spiritual maturity without having that outlet for his gifts, and we all need the assistance and encouragement of other believers (1 Corinthians 12:21–26).

For these reasons and more, church attendance, participation, and fellowship should be regular aspects of a believer’s life. Weekly church attendance is in no sense “required” for believers, but someone who belongs to Christ should have a desire to worship God, receive His Word, and fellowship with other believers.

Jesus is the Cornerstone of the Church (1 Peter 2:6), and we are “like living stones . . . being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 2:5). As the building materials of God’s “spiritual house,” we naturally have a connection with one another, and that connection is evident every time the Church “goes to church.” You are judging all churches to be “judgmental” but Paul says that judgment starts in the house of God (the church). You seem to be judging all churches so you are doing what you are accusing the church of doing.

K. November 30, 2014 at 8:54 pm

Okay, my bad, I meant to state far too much fear of judgmentalism and fear of rejection. And please note I stated the lack of connection and not judgementalism within the church is “a primary reason” we elect to stay away.
You assume that since I tell you we stay away from “church” attendance, we are guilty of “falling into the habit of not meeting with other believers”. You also assume that since we do not attend “church”, we are not “involved in some type of ministry to others”. We attend a group relularly where there is not only the love, “spurring”, encouragement, serving, instructing, honoring, kindness and compassion you speak of in your second paragraph, but also the transparency and motivation for spiritual growth that allows us to confess our sins to one another. We just haven’t found it in typical speaker/spectator type local churches.
We (as a couple, and others–but not all–within our group) also regularly financially support a ministry we believe makes a greater impact for the kingdom of Christ than any other we have yet witnessed.
So getting back to your original question, Should Christains confess their sins one to another? Absolutely! We just don’t witness it in the typical local church.

Jonathan Penner December 31, 2016 at 10:10 pm

Jack, thank you. I love the clarity with which you repeatedly drive home the value of authentic, transparent, community – the kind of community Jesus prayed for in John 17. This is the ONLY way (Jesus words) anyone will know his mission was from the Father.

Jack Wellman January 1, 2017 at 8:55 am

Thank you Mr. Penner. You are so kind. I confessed all of my past to the church before I became a pastor because I wanted nothing to hide. God is good. May God richly bless you sir for your encouragement.

Jamal January 22, 2017 at 12:32 pm

Greetings, I want to ask something that has been troubling me for so long related to confession and forgiveness. May I please know how to contact you privately? Thanks so much

Jack Wellman January 23, 2017 at 8:57 am

I have sent you an email Jamal in the hopes I can help you. Have you not spoken with your pastor about this? why not? That’s what He is there for?

Jack Wellman January 23, 2017 at 8:58 am

Also, click on this to contact me at: http://www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/contact/

Mora August 11, 2017 at 4:51 am

the question is

If Jesus had died for our sins and then our sins have been forgiven, then why we should not sin?

isnt it true that the way of salvation is jesus and by believeing him, our sins will by forgiven?

Jack Wellman August 11, 2017 at 9:21 am

Hello Mora. You have a very good question. Jesus died for our sins and we are saved from God’s wrath, but if you do something wrong with your spouse, you’re still married, but wouldn’t you want to apologize to your spouse if you offended them? We do the same things with friends. If we’re friends, then why do we ask for forgiveness from them and not want to from God? The Bible says we all sin (Rom 3:10-23; 1st John 1:8,10) so when we do sin, we need to confess it to God to be cleansed (1st John 1:9). Read John 11:25-26 to see why we must trust in Jesus.

Richard September 12, 2017 at 1:01 am

I Would Like To Know Exactly What Is Sin Against another person, Christian or not. Please give bible reference. I read earlier in this blog that we can only sin against God. I need clarity please.

Jack Wellman September 12, 2017 at 10:24 am

The statement that is made in the Bible, particularly with David in the psalms is that first and foremost, our sin is against God. Yes, we sin against others,but we need God’s forgiveness as well as whoever we offended and their forgiveness. As for forgiving another person, or needing forgiving, we must go to our brother if they have offended us (Matt 18:15-20) but even if they don’t forgive us for our sins, we can ask for their forgiveness, and if they dont’ forgive us, we can do nothing about it, but if they don’t think they sinned against us, but in fact have, we just have to move on. We must forgive others, even if they don’t ask for it. Jesus prayed for the Father to forgive those who were nailing Him to the cross. The biblical definition of sinning against another is harboring a grude or holding onto unforgiveness, even if asked to be forgiven…and this is sin. Did I answer your question sir?

Teresa February 24, 2018 at 11:26 am

I just read this article. I am the ministry coordinator for Celebrate Recovery at my church and confessing our sons to God, to ourselves, and to another human being are vital for recovery. Transparency is the word that God always gives me as I teach. My transparency, aka confession allows people to see that God doesn’t save perfect people. He saves imperfect people like me. And He uses imperfect people like me. If He can use me and my imperfect life to reach others, he can use anyone. But if they don’t know where God has brought or is bringing me from then how can they understand the truth of what I speak. The answer is they can’t. I have to be transparent. I have to! I remember before I came to Christ all the perfect Christians. I knew I would never be able to be that. Then I met some transparent, imperfect Christians and read the Bible for myself. Changed everything. Thank you for this.

KENNETH KNIGHT January 8, 2020 at 9:01 pm

So if I understand its not enough to confess to God, I am sorry to hear that, and I think my neigbors wife is going to be also. One short time before I became a christain we had an affair for about 5 weeks. I heard she also has become a Christain and has baby too. My question is do I need to confess using her name ?
Who do I confess to and does that include to my wife also. What if I loss the one Ireally love over it and end up with a divorce, will that be another sin that I nned to confess
thanks in advance kenneth

Jack Wellman January 9, 2020 at 6:41 am

This article is about confessing our faults and those things we all struggle with…not confessing all our sins to people we know. It’s about transparency and honesty, saying, “Pray for me…I strugle with this or that.” I hope that helps so you don’t need to use someone’s name to confess. God knows.

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