How to Get Along With Other Christians

by Robert Driskell · Print Print · Email Email

The actions of Christians should be characterized by love, peace, joy, and other evidences that we are children of the Living God.  Too many times, the church is seen as anything but loving.  How are we to live with one another in this relationship called ‘The Church’?  The New Testament gives us many instructions for getting along with other Christians.

Love one another

(II Corinthians 13:11; I Thessalonians 3:12, 4:9; I Peter 1:22; 4:8; I John 3:11, 23; 4:7, 11-12; II John 1:5)

“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor” (Romans 12:10 ESV). 

Over and over, we are commanded to love one another in the Lord.  The Bible does not instruct us to do anything that God does not empower us to do.  Therefore, God expects, and has enabled, us to act as He instructs us to act.  However, ‘love’ is defined differently by different people.  What is ‘love’?  Let us look at some of the ways in which we can show love to one another.  [I Corinthians, which is sometimes called ‘the Love chapter’, is a concise snapshot concerning love and should also be considered alongside the verses and passages in this article]

Related Reading: Love One Another: Bible Verses and Life Application

Forgive each other

(I Corinthians 6:6-8; Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:13)

“Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all” (Romans 12:17 ESV). 

Holding a grudge can sour much more than the attitude of the grudge-holder.  It can ruin relationships, both human and heavenly, and it can fester into something much more destructive if left unaddressed.  The Bible tells us to forgive one another as God has forgiven us (Matthew 6:14; Luke 6:37).

The actions of Christians should be characterized by love, peace, joy, and other evidences that we are children of the Living God.

The actions of Christians should be characterized by love, peace, joy, and other evidences that we are children of the Living God.

Don’t complain about others behind their back

(James 4:11; 5:9)

The Bible instructs us to not grumble, or complain, against one another.  Scripture has set forth the proper procedures for confronting a brother or sister (Matthew 18:14-17).  It is much better to follow biblical instruction than to let a grievance grow in one’s heart.

Serve each other

(I Peter 4:9-10)

God has gifted each of us in order that we may serve Him.  Often, we serve God by serving others, both within the church and outside of it.

Related Reading: 20 Amazing Serving Quotes

Pray for each other

(James 5:16)

I have often heard it said that it is impossible to remain angry with, or unforgiving toward, anyone for whom you are praying.  The act of praying for someone is actually an act of love toward that person and dependence on the provisions of God.

Be humble and encouraging towards each other

(Romans 12:15-16; I Corinthians 12:24-26; Ephesians 4:2, 5:21; I Thessalonians 4:18, 5:11, 15; Hebrews 3:13; 10:24-25; I Peter 5:5)

“Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother” (Romans 14:13 ESV). 

No one has all the answers; no one was saved because they were better than someone else. Salvation is by God’s grace; it is not earned or merited; therefore, we must be very careful with our attitude toward other Christians.  The Bible tells us to view our brothers and sisters as better than ourselves (Philippians 2:3).  We also know that pride is a terrible vice that can sour even the best of intentions (I John 2:16).

Conclusion

So, how do we get along with each other? The Bible tells us to love, forgive, serve, and encourage one another.  It also tells us that we should pray for each other, not complain about each other, and be humble towards one another.  For human beings that is a tall order to fill.  On our own, we know we are bound to fail.  Humans are naturally selfish and concerned with pleasing the self rather than serving others.  However, as followers of Jesus Christ, we have been empowered by the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit, Who enables us to live as God wants us to live; exhibiting His love His way.

The apostle Paul addresses this very subject in Galatians, chapter five:

“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do…And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires” (Galatians 5:13-17, 24 ESV).

The best way, the only way, for Christians to get along with other Christians (and the rest of the world, for that matter), is to submit fully to the loving control of the Holy Spirit.  When God is controlling our actions and attitudes, we can be assured that there will be unity among the body of Christ (I Peter 3:8).

Take a look at another article: Christians Persecuting Other Christians

Resources – The Holy Bible, English Standard Version “Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.”

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{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

DocReits November 23, 2013 at 12:34 pm

Thank you Robert….good conviction. Dealing with my pride is my daily(second by second) cross. Pride being my main hindrance to love.

“Taking up” that cross is such a necessity for me to have mercy(love) for others. As you so well said, only through the HS’s help can this possibly be successful for me. Keep up the great work. You are making a difference in my life.

Blessings,

DocReits

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Robert November 25, 2013 at 10:31 am

Thank you, Doc. It is encouraging to hear that God is using me for His glory. God bless you brother.
Yours in Christ,
Robert

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Mr A Cotton November 29, 2013 at 7:47 pm

I agree with you all the way Robert about what you have said.
I am glad you pointed out about human beings wrongs,and it`s in our nature to hold a grudge.
I was on a Christian forum about two years ago and they seem to be trying to out do each other with quotes and it did not create a nice feeling so I left and the Holy Spirit(I Think) dropped me off here.
I can`t stand it when people use quotes out of the bible to back there argument up. To me this is not what the bible is for.
You are quite right that we can`t do it ourselves.
The truth is that we will only see this in heaven and there are only a few true christians in the world today who can do what you say. I am guilty of this. Two Examples – My son broke my Jaw and Nose on two separate occasions and he some time later he had to go to prison.
I said I would have nothing to do with him at all in front of witnesses for what he done to me but I ended up visiting him every month and giving him £20 a month in prison.
2- I could not see my first Grandson because my son packed her in and married another girl.
She took this out of me by reporting me to the police that I was behaving inappropriately towards my Grandson who spent the weekend at my house with her permission and my son`s.
I panicked and I was waiting for the police to arrive but they did not come so I went to the priest.
He said I will make an appointment with a solicitor for you now and don`t worry you have done nothing wrong.
I went to the solicitors and the he said the same you have not done anything wrong.
I answered how do you know I have done nothing wrong he replied because you would be in a prison cell now.
He explained that a childcare protection team would have went out and questioned my Grandson.
I later found out that the officer said he could tell she was making it up. They questioned my Grandson who was nearly 4 yrs old and the only thing he said my Grandad will not give me any Cocoa Pops and the case was closed.
Like you said Robert I am human and I was trying to think how I could get my own back.
I knew she did not have a TV licence so I shopped her.
Not far back through this sight I was learning by what you said to try and forgive her.
I will never forget it,but I am confused to wether I have forgiven her.
Each day I never think about it at all so do you think I have forgiven her and If I saw her tomorrow I would speak to her(Not Angry) Robert.

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Robert December 2, 2013 at 10:57 am

Hi Mr. Cotton,
It’s good to hear from you. The Bible teaches us to forgive others, but this does not mean that we allow those who have hurt us, or abused us, to continue to do so. Forgiveness basically means that we do not seek to make the person (or persons) who have hurt us pay for what they did. In other words, we no longer seek revenge. But again, this does not mean that we allow that person (or persons) to repeatedly hurt us again. I know you are seeking God’s guidance in all you do, Mr. Cotton. I simply encourage you to continue being faithful to God and His Word…He will never let you down.
Yours in Christ,
Robert

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Mr A Cotton December 2, 2013 at 1:52 pm

Yes Robert I think I forgive them,but I will never forget what they did to me.
This puts a doubt in my head “I will never forget what they did to me)
I don`t think about getting revenge I am talking to my Son but his x girlfriend I have not seen her since I was at court to try to get to see my first grandson and that was about 8 years ago.
I think she will still be bitter about it.
I was the only one that went to the Family Court to try to see my Grandson,and it took nearly a year. I asked the child worker who makes the decision she replied her Mr Cotton.
I replied well all this has been a waste of time and money,and the Social Worker to the Court was in my favour,but that did not matter.

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NICHOLAS December 3, 2013 at 4:13 am

IT CERTAINLY IS HARD TO FORGIVE THOSE WHO ARE YOUR ENEMIES ISN’T IT !!!!!!!!!!

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Robert December 3, 2013 at 8:16 am

Nicholas,
Without God, it’s impossible.
Yours in Christ,
Robert

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Mr A Cotton December 3, 2013 at 2:33 pm

I look at it this way yes you have to try and forgive your enemies through Gods help.
What happens when these are disguised has the devils angels?
The devil is good at what he does.
If you look he is all around because Earth is the Devils playground,and thats a fact.

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Robert December 3, 2013 at 4:00 pm

Mr. Cotton,
Empowered by the Holy Spirit, we are able to love our enemies also. God bless you, brother.
Yours in Christ,
Robert

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NICHOLAS December 4, 2013 at 12:20 am

ROBERT , I have had a very hard time given to me by a person who sends daily verses , and discusses going to church , but I can’t help but feel that this person has been awfully cruel to me . This person has seen to it through-out this past year that I would lose vacation days , they say they lose and I should lose too . They are the supervisor and I am the assistant , and there is no way for me to come out of this on top . If I do what H.R. says to do then I will have this person to be even more of an enemy than they are now . It is hard to go into to so much to explain what happens and what has happened . I never want to question another person salvation , I can’t hardly even do this by discernment , and we all sin . I know one great thing , it makes me think about how I correspond with others , I surely do-not want to ever do anyone wrong , or to fiddle with their lively hood especially when they are doing their best . I can only pray for this person , and I am asking others to also in whatever means they need , and for myself too , and I certainly know I am not without sin , none of us are . I heard that worry is the opposite of worship , so I want to worship and rely on GOD’s help in everything , and have the reassurance that he will bless me !! Thank – you so much to all others who will whisper a prayer for me . I want to ask a prayer for a good good friend’s husband , his name is Gary , her son is Chris , and it is through this site that I have gained a friend that I will meet in heaven one day , she is just a friend but a GOD sent person . My wife and all my family members I ask prayers for of course , I love them all so very much , my wife is my baby-doll , thank-you all so much .

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Robert December 4, 2013 at 9:13 am

Nicholas,
I do not know the person you are talking about, so I can’t comment on his or her Christianity, but I do know that too many professing Christians do not behave like Jesus wants us to behave. However, we are instructed to forgive other Christians when they do us wrong and to even forgive our enemies. Rest assured that I (as well as others who I’m sure will see your comments) will be praying for you, your family, your job, and your supervisors. Let me tell you what I’ve experienced when I leave it all to God; He always gets me through whatever it is I’m facing. And I don’t mean He just barely sees me through either. I actually feel the strengthening presence of the Holy Spirit within my soul. Not only that, but God always takes care of the situation in ways I never imagined. My point is that it is always better, in any situation, to trust God and rest in the peace and promises He gives us in His Word. I hope this helps, Nicholas.
Yours in Christ,
Robert

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NICHOLAS December 5, 2013 at 4:43 am

THIS HELPED TREMENDOUSLY , I CAN RELATE BIG-TIME TO GOD ANSWERING IN SUCH A WONDERFUL WAY , AND IN THE MEANTIME I FEEL THE PRAYERS , I FEEL SUCH A PEACE ABOUT THIS OVER ME , I’M NOT EVEN WORRYING ABOUT THIS AS I MAY HAVE DONE IN THE PAST , I KNOW GOD WILL KEEP ON HELPING ME , I KNOW GOD IS WISE AND GOD IS LOVE SO ISN’T IT APPARENT THAT TO LOVE IS TO BE WISE , I THINK OF HOW SOLOMON RATHER THAN ASKING FOR RICHES ASKED FOR WISDOM , THE RICHES WERE ADDED UNTO HIM BECAUSE HE ASKED FOR WISDOM OUT OF LOVE FOR THE PEOPLE AND FOR GOD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Robert December 6, 2013 at 8:17 am

Nicholas,
It is so encouraging for me to hear that my service to God has helped someone. Keep trusting God and know that you are being prayed for. God bless you, brother.
Yours in Christ,
Robert

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DocReits December 7, 2013 at 11:03 pm

Hey Nicholas,

My heart was moved by your story and I am praying that God will move in such a way in your life that you will know that your answer could only have come from God.

I have had similar experiences in the past where my direct boss would yell and scream obscenities at me, draw dirty pictures of me and do everything in his power to make my life as miserable as possible. Yet, I needed the job for my wife and children to subsist and felt it was where God wanted me.

I was a new Christian at the time and tried my best to present a Christian example. My manager later did became a Christian, as a result of God’s grace. Your circumstances are different in that your super states he is a Christian. What is the same between our stories, though, is that you and I serve the same God.

God can work a miracle in your super’s life, but more importantly, in yours. I am excited for you, as you watch the great things God has coming your way…;-)

Blessings,

DocReits

P.S. You mentioned Solomon and his request for wisdom. Have you ever wondered how in the world this “wise” man ever ended his life in idolatry? I have often wondered if his wealth and blessing from God, you mention, ended up being his undoing.

Not that the wealth itself was the “undoing”, but Solomon’s departure from God, which was a direct result, in his life, of his life of ease which the wealth allowed. What do you think?

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NICHOLAS December 11, 2013 at 5:44 am

doc reits , what about is it belshazzar — he saw one to look like that of the son of GOD did he believe ? did he go to heaven perhaps ??

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DocReits December 12, 2013 at 12:15 am

Hey Nicholas,

Did you mean King Belshazzar(Daniel 5) or King Nebuchadnezzar?(Daniel 4). Belshazzar was a pretty sorry fellow. He used the Lord’s golden utensils for his drunken orgy and then the hand appeared and wrote his death sentence on the wall, correct? He was dead before the night was over.

Only God knows if he went to heaven but I would guess no, that he is not in heaven, based on Daniel’s account:

“They drank wine and praised the gods of gold and silver, bronze, iron, wood and stone.” (Dan. 5:2-4)

Was it his father, King Nebuchadnezzar that you meant? He was the king who looked into the fiery furnace which he had Daniel’s friends Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego thrown into. It was there where he saw the fourth man, which:

“he saw one to look like that of the son of GOD” walking with Daniel’s friends. It is easier to believe King Nebuchadnezzar is in heaven because although he did many evil things, he ended his life humbled and praising the God of heaven(remember when he lost his mind for seven years and wandered around like an animal?).

“And at the end of the time I, Nebuchadnezzar, lifted my eyes to heaven, and my understanding returned to me; and I blessed the Most High and praised and honored Him who lives forever: For His dominion is an everlasting dominion, and His kingdom is from generation to generation. All the inhabitants of the earth are reputed as nothing;

He does according to His will in the army of heaven and among the inhabitants of the earth. No one can restrain His hand or say to Him, “What have You done?” At the same time my reason returned to me, and for the glory of my kingdom, my honor and splendor returned to me.

My counselors and nobles resorted to me, I was restored to my kingdom, and excellent majesty was added to me. Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and extol and honor the King of heaven, all of whose works are truth, and His ways justice. And those who walk in pride He is able to put down.”(Dan 4:34-37)

So since he was repentant and worshiped Daniel’s God he might be in heaven…only God knows.

Blessings,

DocReits

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NICHOLAS December 12, 2013 at 3:40 am

BACK TO DOCREITS , I HAVE READ THE BIBLE THROUGH BUT I NEED TO SEVERAL MORE TIMES FOR SURE , MAYBE EVEN 100 MORE TIMES TO CATCH UP WITH YOU– JUST HEARD A PREACHER ONCE SAY TOO THAT THE KING EVEN BEING THE ONE THAT HAD TO DECIDE FOR THE PEOPLE SO HE WOULDN’T LOSE FACE SO TO SPEAK TO EVEN THROW THEM IN THE FURNACE , HE SURE WAS HAPPY WHEN THEY CAME OUT ……… HEY I SURE APPRECIATE YOUR PRAYERS TOO , AND JUST WANTED TO HEAR YOUR VIEWS , I KNOW YOU ARE WELL READ MORE SO THAN I WHEN IT COMES TO THE SCRIPTURE . I’M SURE SAUL WAS GLAD WHEN THE PEOPLE HALTED HIM ON PUNISHING HIS OWN SON ABOUT EATING THE HONEY COMB — SIMULIAR IN A WAY

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NICHOLAS December 12, 2013 at 3:43 am

ALSO — DOCREITS , MY BREAK ON THIRD GOES BY TO FAST , THEN I SLEEP ALL DAY TOO , NEED TO READ MORE SLOWLY ON YOUR WORDS BACK , THANKS FOR YOUR FRIENDSHIP TOO ……….

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DocReits December 12, 2013 at 9:55 am

Blessings upon you Nicholas….;-)

DocReits

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NICHOLAS December 13, 2013 at 2:49 pm

more time to read your above , yes now I remember more , did he eat grass at one time and was like an animal ? I tell you I really get so much from JOB too , satan came along and wanted to do things to him , I think this is such a book in the Bible where GOD shows us HE is teaching us and HE showed where even when JOB’s friends just knew he needed to repent and this and that had so much to ponder on of why all this was happening , and they were all wrong and JOB prayed for them in the end , You certainly can learn so much from the scripture , how could anyone not see how the Bible just speaks to your heart and gives you understanding more and more , it is words that help you over and over , you read once and it helps you this way , you read again and it helps you in another way . I have recently spoke to a man who questions it in a way where he says if men wrote it it would seem it would have to be tainted , I don’t believe that , if GOD can and did create all HE surely can make the scripture to be correct !!!

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Robert December 13, 2013 at 3:17 pm

Hi Nicholas,

Good to hear from you again.

God’s Word is clear to anyone who will allow it to speak to them. The people of whom you speak, who can’t seem to see the Bible’s wisdom, can’t see it because they don’t want to see it. Or they see it and reject it. God spoke to men, and those words were written down. The men didn’t just write things that they thought of; they wrote the very Words of God, “For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit” (II Peter 1:21 ESV). And you are absolutely right, God made Scripture correct AND He protects it. We have reliable copies of the very Words that God gave to His people to record.

I have studied many years, and I’ve heard all the claims of unbelievers who say the Bible is full of discrepancies and contradictions. There are no contradictions in the Bible. Every so-called contradiction has a perfectly valid resolution if one wants to know the truth. However, too many of these non-believers don’t want to know the truth, they just want to try to confuse Christians or cause them to doubt. Let me reassure anyone reading this: if we keep our focus on God, we cannot be led astray by anyone or anything. God is powerful, He cannot be fooled and, if we keep close to Him, neither can we.

God bless you Nicholas. I can tell by your comments that you have a heart for God. You want to know God and do His will. That is an admirable, and intelligent, attitude. May the Lord bless you richly, brother.

Yours in Christ,
Robert

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Mr A Cotton December 13, 2013 at 5:14 pm

I have delved into this subject when they were writing the King James Bible. I think they had about 52 interpreter`s working on the Bible,and there were misinterpretation`s.
One Example – Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a. a. Donkey b. an Ass c. a Mule.
The biggest one I came across was when Judas hung himself.
Judas went away and hung himself or Judas went headlong and his bowels gushed all over.
I had never heard of the second one,and like you say I searched for the truth,and like Jesus said seek and you shall find,and I did.
I found out that the two were linked together, Judas hung himself,and the branch broke,or the rope snapped,and he fell on sharp stones below splitting his bowels all over.
I have not known a misinterpretation of God`s or Jesus`s
word.
The interpreter`s have left out words when they should have been left in.
I have lost no sleep over it.
There have evan been prophecies that have not unfolded because they were false and tried to lead you astray.
I agree with one thing their are a vast number including me that can`t understand many things in the Bible.
You rightly say that these non believer`s don`t want you to know the truth.
I have evan listened to atheist`s or pretender`s like the Diamond Brother`s who claim to be St Benedictine Monks,and I checked them out and they are not evan on the register of that holy order.
They evan banned me from exposing them on YouTube,but I was subscribed to Catholics Exodus which they could do nothing about Truth prevails with God side you.

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NICHOLAS December 20, 2013 at 3:34 am

WRITERS / READERS FROM NICHOLAS , HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS , KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS , YOU’RE IN MINE

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