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Teaching Children to Prepare For, Resist and Respond to Peer Pressure

Christian children are facing increasing peer pressure to make bad choices, so how can children respond when faced with peer pressure?

Peer Pressure

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When someone or some group tries to make you do something you know is wrong, that is peer pressure and it is hard to resist when it comes from your classmates. Peers are those who are your co-workers or classmates, but peer pressure can come from families too, not just the work place or in schools. Adults as well as children face peer pressure every day but it’s hard for Christians to face this pressure when it’s all around them. I too, like most adults, have caved-into the pressure from others around us, even though we know it’s wrong. Therefore, it is important to prepare ahead of time to resist peer pressure so children (and we) can resist it and when we are faced with it (we all are, daily!), they and we will know how to respond.

Prepare

When I was in the Boy Scouts, being prepared was perhaps the most important thing next to obedience to the manual. We had to be prepared for the unexpected. We even had a handbook that told us what to do under certain situations. So too must we and our children and grandchildren be ready and prepared when ungodly peer pressure comes; and it will come! First of all, ask your children (and yourself) the following questions:

What places is it easier to be influenced for bad?

What places is it easier to be influenced for good?

Am I thinking ahead of time about how I will respond when pressured to do something I know is wrong?

Have I rehearsed an answer ahead of time so I’ll be ready to resist the pressure?

How might these pressures be challenged ahead of time? Like being challenged to break a rule at school, to let someone cheat off of your homework or test, to drink or smoke anything, or if adult, to cover for someone who wants to leave work early.

Are you ready for and are you expecting pressure when around people who are not Christian?

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Resist

Why is it so hard to say no? I guess we love fitting in and want to be accepted by God, but when the pressure comes, what will they (and you) do? The Bible teaches that if we resist the Devil, he will flee from us (James 4:7), but that’s not enough. The first part of this verse tells us what to do: Be subject (or obey) God. If you obey God, you are already resisting the Devil. Real friends do not get you into trouble or try to get you do something you know is wrong, illegal or unethical. Real friends keep you out of trouble. God says that bad company corrupts morals (1 Cor 15:33). You cannot submit to God and do evil at the same time. You will do one or the other. Of course we will all fail (I have!), but we strive to submit to God’s laws as best we can. This often reduces the strength of temptation (like ungodly peer pressure). Even if we’re able to keep from being caught, our conscience convicts us because deep down, we know it’s wrong (Rom 2:15), and the Holy Spirit will let us know (John 16:8). Now, ask your children or grandchildren (and yourself) these questions:

Are you willing to take the risk of people rejecting you because you would rather obey God?

What are the best ways you can say “No!”

[3]Is it harder to say “no” at school (or work, or at family gatherings)?

Is it harder to say no to a person or to a group?

What is really most important? Is it to please God and be accepted by Him or to please the crowd where God is not pleased?

Gossip is sin, so don’t let the crowd pressure you into listening to gossip, because if you do, you are keeping this sin going.

It’s good to know that peer pressure doesn’t last for long, and if the crowd is disappointed in you and calls you a coward, it won’t last forever. You might not be popular with the crowd…but you will be respected by the crowd, and that’s more important. It’s more important to be respected than popular. Ask Jesus. He is greatly pleased when you successfully resist the pressure to commit a wrong. Perhaps some in the crowd wished they had your courage.

Respond

How to say NO and mean it!

Use a strong, calm voice and say firmly, “No thank you.”

They may not like you then…but they might respect you later.Famous Bible Verses [4]

Just walk away! There is power in this response. Walk away and say, “No thank you!”

Find someone who agrees with your choice to say no to doing wrong things.

Calmly but decidedly say “No” and just walk away, or just change the subject if you can’t walk away (like you’re in a class or workplace and can’t leave).

Remember that Jesus sees everything. He is with you. Would He accept the thing you might do? Pleasing Him is more satisfying than pleasing the crowd. You might feel good about fitting in with the crowd then, but you’ll feel miserably guilty later after doing it (whatever it is). And you could possibly get into some serious trouble, so what is popular may not be right and what may be right may not be popular. Do the right thing anyway! God will surely bless you and strengthen you to resist this temptation through prayer and memorizing Scripture (Psalm 119:11).

Conclusion

I pray you have put your trust in our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. If that has not happened yet, my friend, you are in real danger of hell fire. And I mean, in immediate danger. You’re one breath, one heartbeat…one accident away from eternity when it will be too late to repent. Today is the best day to believe (2 Cor 6:2) since tomorrow is no guarantee. If Jesus Christ came today, here is your fate (Matt 7:21-23). This is why I plead with you as you read this, repent today…and I mean right now. Put your trust in Jesus Christ. If you do not, you will face God’s judgment after death guaranteed (Heb 9:27) or at Jesus Christ’s appearance (Rev 20:12-15), which could happen at any moment.

Here is some related reading for you: How to Raise a Child in a Christian Home [5]

Resource – Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), Crossway Bibles. (2007). ESV: Study Bible: English standard version. Wheaton, Ill: Crossway Bibles. Used by permission. All rights reserved.